








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 386 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 47 matches | ||
| Wingman | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Faceit | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 21 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1387 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,570 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 828 | 18% |
| Smokes | 1281 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1217 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 1244 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $686,085 of utility $223 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 306 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Odin | 2 | 0.0015 |
| #2 | m1kianN =) | 2 | 0.0027 |
| #3 | Gold Digger | 2 | 0.0031 |
| #4 | SakkeS | 2 | 0.0032 |
| #5 | Ode | 2 | 0.0036 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Odin | 256 | 0.19 | 7 min |
| #2 | temeq | 141 | 0.22 | 5 min |
| #3 | Gold Digger | 118 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| #4 | OGpirttihirmu | 100 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #5 | m1kianN =) | 77 | 0.10 | 2 min |





