








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 495 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 198 matches | ||
| Wingman | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 18 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3425 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,701 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2824 | 29% |
| Smokes | 2929 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 1544 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 2404 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $643,402 of utility $104 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 110 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Revaaz | 64% | 36 |
| #2 | Sirr0m | 56% | 50 |
| #3 | dasdingmitsosse | 53% | 57 |
| #4 | DaviD | 51% | 226 |
| #5 | madsam77 | 50% | 157 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | .smirnoff | 48% | 40 |
| #7 | Houwzer | 47% | 130 |
| #8 | Guido | 47% | 90 |
| #9 | neugyyy | 44% | 104 |
| #10 | Oni | 43% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DaviD | 13 | 0.0028 |
| #2 | neugyyy | 6 | 0.0030 |
| #3 | madsam77 | 4 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | Houwzer | 4 | 0.0015 |
| #5 | .smirnoff | 3 | 0.0036 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DaviD | 1193 | 0.25 | 26 min |
| #2 | Houwzer | 594 | 0.22 | 14 min |
| #3 | neugyyy | 585 | 0.29 | 12 min |
| #4 | madsam77 | 466 | 0.14 | 11 min |
| #5 | Sirr0m | 303 | 0.28 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DaviD | +2.55 | 79 | 64 |
| #2 | Revaaz | +1.81 | 81 | 75 |
| #3 | mattocardo | +1.03 | 83 | 61 |
| #4 | Sirr0m | +0.10 | 73 | 71 |
| #5 | Guido | -1.12 | 83 | 54 |





