








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 130 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 71 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1367 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,276 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1707 | 40% |
| Smokes | 1016 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 602 | 14% |
| Molotovs | 951 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $299,718 of utility $84 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 132 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Janitsek | 60% | 10 |
| #2 | Muka420 | 50% | 12 |
| #3 | Le_AbrA | 50% | 30 |
| #4 | z1x | 50% | 42 |
| #5 | wulttt:)) | 50% | 153 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | Kilbz | 46% | 13 |
| #10 | ok spaghet e | 45% | 40 |
| #11 | Aimlox | 44% | 18 |
| #12 | m2his | 40% | 15 |
| #13 | yesn't | 18% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wulttt:)) | 6 | 0.0019 |
| #2 | Le_AbrA | 6 | 0.0096 |
| #3 | Nef | 4 | 0.0084 |
| #4 | ok spaghet e | 3 | 0.0036 |
| #5 | p9nda | 2 | 0.0027 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wulttt:)) | 345 | 0.11 | 9 min |
| #2 | Osama bin Laden | 67 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #3 | Le_AbrA | 64 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #4 | ok spaghet e | 60 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #5 | Aimlox | 45 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wulttt:)) | +3.10 | 77 | 51 |
| #2 | Nef | +2.56 | 81 | 31 |
| #3 | z1x | +1.44 | 79 | 33 |
| #4 | Aimlox | +0.46 | 85 | 67 |
| #5 | yesn't | +0.08 | 60 | 48 |





