








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 556 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 270 matches | ||
| Faceit | 142 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 79 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4494 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,448 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3995 | 38% |
| Smokes | 548 | 5% |
| HE Grenades | 4073 | 39% |
| Molotovs | 1832 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,302,417 of utility $130 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2434 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | serp3x | 52% | 325 |
| #2 | ndrs | 52% | 321 |
| #3 | DinoSo | 51% | 81 |
| #4 | KLPS | 50% | 228 |
| #5 | yallufa | 50% | 301 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | ndrs | 52% | 321 |
| #3 | DinoSo | 51% | 81 |
| #4 | KLPS | 50% | 228 |
| #5 | yallufa | 50% | 301 |
| #6 | rw | 49% | 105 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ndrs | 5 | 0.0007 |
| #2 | yallufa | 5 | 0.0008 |
| #3 | KLPS | 4 | 0.0008 |
| #4 | serp3x | 3 | 0.0004 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ndrs | 1292 | 0.19 | 32 min |
| #2 | yallufa | 500 | 0.08 | 12 min |
| #3 | serp3x | 419 | 0.06 | 9 min |
| #4 | KLPS | 371 | 0.08 | 10 min |
| #5 | DinoSo | 213 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | serp3x | +1.91 | 78 | 63 |
| #2 | yallufa | +1.11 | 86 | 59 |
| #3 | sabotaaž Sumatra stiilis | -0.30 | 88 | 57 |
| #4 | ndrs | -0.30 | 69 | 71 |
| #5 | DinoSo | -0.32 | 73 | 70 |





