








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 92 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1523 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,100 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 220 | 20% |
| Smokes | 513 | 47% |
| HE Grenades | 291 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 76 | 7% |
Our logs show you have wasted $730,455 of utility $202 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 180 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | TwinZ | 31% | 13 |
| #12 | im not fertile anymore | 31% | 13 |
| #13 | man finder | 30% | 50 |
| #14 | Zephen | 30% | 27 |
| #15 | american nights | 18% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | man finder | 10 | 0.0099 |
| #2 | Jabbie | 10 | 0.0156 |
| #3 | tim | 8 | 0.0157 |
| #4 | m[]tive | 7 | 0.0088 |
| #5 | aust | 6 | 0.0073 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chasing Amnesia? | +2.47 | 62 | 57 |
| #2 | m[]tive | +2.07 | 93 | 37 |
| #3 | tim | +1.78 | 76 | 63 |
| #4 | TwinZ | +1.57 | 75 | 78 |
| #5 | Zephen | +1.45 | 75 | 42 |





