








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 527 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 125 matches | ||
| Wingman | 36 matches | ||
| Faceit | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 26 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2423 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,072 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3118 | 39% |
| Smokes | 1650 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 2108 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 1196 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $681,839 of utility $145 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 488 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | KriZ | 56% | 45 |
| #10 | ilikememes♡ | 55% | 47 |
| #11 | reverse | 55% | 66 |
| #12 | Sjop | 50% | 12 |
| #13 | TurboRunk♿ | 39% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nexuz | 7 | 0.0045 |
| #2 | 2bi2 | 5 | 0.0067 |
| #3 | Lyngpøsen | 5 | 0.0084 |
| #4 | Fripop ❟❛❟ | 4 | 0.0037 |
| #5 | KriZ | 4 | 0.0043 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nexuz | 246 | 0.16 | 6 min |
| #2 | reverse | 209 | 0.18 | 5 min |
| #3 | Tox1c_Fla1r | 180 | 0.26 | 5 min |
| #4 | KriZ | 176 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| #5 | 2bi2 | 156 | 0.21 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NAKO LFT | +2.88 | 83 | 63 |
| #2 | Lyngpøsen | +1.93 | 67 | 66 |
| #3 | 2bi2 | +1.39 | 72 | 66 |
| #4 | Fripop ❟❛❟ | +1.19 | 80 | 55 |
| #5 | Tox1c_Fla1r | +1.12 | 65 | 75 |





