








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 240 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 260 matches | ||
| Premier | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3233 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,030 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 991 | 20% |
| Smokes | 1367 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1147 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 1525 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,613,929 of utility $224 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 43 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | zaggi | 84% | 32 |
| #2 | Noxos | 61% | 141 |
| #3 | simpel | 61% | 28 |
| #4 | fandanGO | 60% | 146 |
| #5 | dD-.- | 59% | 261 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BR1X | 10 | 0.0016 |
| #2 | fandanGO | 1 | 0.0003 |
| #3 | Larven10 | 1 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dD-.- | 836 | 0.14 | 25 min |
| #2 | BR1X | 399 | 0.06 | 9 min |
| #3 | Noxos | 306 | 0.10 | 8 min |
| #4 | Tordenkile | 215 | 0.08 | 6 min |
| #5 | fandanGO | 206 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fandanGO | +1.80 | 91 | 60 |
| #2 | dD-.- | +1.75 | 61 | 76 |
| #3 | BR1X | +1.23 | 84 | 58 |
| #4 | zaggi | +1.03 | 88 | 59 |
| #5 | Noxos | +0.45 | 80 | 69 |





