








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 17 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 364 matches | ||
| Wingman | 62 matches | ||
| Faceit | 62 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




149 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5778 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 23,537 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6454 | 27% |
| Smokes | 6638 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 6324 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 4121 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $866,093 of utility $63 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 170 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ands | 59% | 59 |
| #2 | PanPanQQ | 54% | 139 |
| #3 | daeronz | 53% | 75 |
| #4 | Lethal Chaps | 51% | 37 |
| #5 | Seizjin | 50% | 38 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | daeronz | 53% | 75 |
| #4 | Lethal Chaps | 51% | 37 |
| #5 | Seizjin | 50% | 38 |
| #6 | Gaetaen BE | 49% | 233 |
| #7 | Breniac | 46% | 72 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gaetaen BE | 33 | 0.0068 |
| #2 | PanPanQQ | 9 | 0.0031 |
| #3 | Breniac | 6 | 0.0038 |
| #4 | Seizjin | 6 | 0.0079 |
| #5 | daeronz | 4 | 0.0027 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gaetaen BE | 393 | 0.08 | 8 min |
| #2 | Breniac | 292 | 0.19 | 8 min |
| #3 | ands | 213 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| #4 | PanPanQQ | 161 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| #5 | daeronz | 147 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Seizjin | +2.77 | 90 | 50 |
| #2 | PanPanQQ | +1.02 | 53 | 60 |
| #3 | Gaetaen BE | +0.78 | 54 | 60 |
| #4 | J u L y u S | +0.78 | 78 | 57 |
| #5 | daeronz | +0.16 | 84 | 50 |





