








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 363 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 164 matches | ||
| Premier | 11 matches | ||
| Renown | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3808 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,960 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1742 | 22% |
| Smokes | 1835 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 2288 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 2095 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $835,102 of utility $135 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 147 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dankes | 69% | 26 |
| #2 | kani | 68% | 47 |
| #3 | UMBREON | 68% | 25 |
| #4 | maradona10x | 47% | 34 |
| #5 | spazeONE | 45% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | UMBREON | 68% | 25 |
| #4 | maradona10x | 47% | 34 |
| #5 | spazeONE | 45% | 22 |
| #6 | Snake | 41% | 56 |
| #7 | Abdel | 39% | 41 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Snake | 2 | 0.0017 |
| #2 | kani | 2 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | dankes | 1 | 0.0017 |
| #4 | UMBREON | 1 | 0.0018 |
| #5 | spazeONE | 1 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kani | 225 | 0.19 | 7 min |
| #2 | Abdel | 200 | 0.22 | 5 min |
| #3 | dankes | 113 | 0.19 | 2 min |
| #4 | maradona10x | 99 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #5 | Snake | 90 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Domajzer | +1.60 | 87 | 60 |
| #2 | kani | +1.33 | 88 | 71 |
| #3 | Snake | +0.61 | 95 | 56 |
| #4 | maradona10x | +0.58 | 76 | 73 |
| #5 | dankes | -0.00 | 79 | 56 |





