








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2115 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 358 matches | ||
| Premier | 32 matches | ||
| Wingman | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 141 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4612 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 32,653 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 11335 | 35% |
| Smokes | 7657 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 7204 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 6457 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,370,611 of utility $126 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1863 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Askadar | 69% | 29 |
| #2 | d3LiveRator | 63% | 137 |
| #3 | bananaman.b * JÄGERMEISTER | 62% | 186 |
| #4 | efron | 62% | 61 |
| #5 | PAVEL | 61% | 31 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hauntry | 5 | 0.0023 |
| #2 | Vanaas13 | 4 | 0.0019 |
| #3 | bananaman.b * JÄGERMEISTER | 2 | 0.0005 |
| #4 | d3LiveRator | 2 | 0.0007 |
| #5 | Askadar | 2 | 0.0032 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hauntry | 721 | 0.33 | 21 min |
| #2 | techmeyer | 470 | 0.17 | 10 min |
| #3 | bananaman.b * JÄGERMEISTER | 418 | 0.10 | 12 min |
| #4 | Koty | 306 | 0.16 | 7 min |
| #5 | Vanaas13 | 237 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sanchez | +3.25 | 83 | 90 |
| #2 | d3LiveRator | +2.43 | 73 | 56 |
| #3 | fux | +1.12 | 79 | 69 |
| #4 | hauntry | +0.94 | 65 | 82 |
| #5 | Koty | +0.83 | 82 | 62 |





