










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 139 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 483 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 117 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 66 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 31 matches | ||
| Faceit | 30 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 22 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




37 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7081 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 20,914 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5507 | 26% |
| Smokes | 7215 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 4372 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 3820 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,003,603 of utility $170 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1182 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Filth | 45% | 53 |
| #5 | riskyray | 44% | 59 |
| #6 | averageausty | 44% | 87 |
| #7 | Doubledinker | 42% | 76 |
| #8 | dandydave | 41% | 76 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dandydave | 13 | 0.0080 |
| #2 | averageausty | 8 | 0.0043 |
| #3 | kookykev | 6 | 0.0031 |
| #4 | boogiebenny | 5 | 0.0041 |
| #5 | Filth | 4 | 0.0037 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | averageausty | 314 | 0.17 | 9 min |
| #2 | dandydave | 239 | 0.15 | 8 min |
| #3 | Doubledinker | 223 | 0.13 | 6 min |
| #4 | riskyray | 183 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| #5 | boogiebenny | 124 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kookykev | +1.48 | 71 | 51 |
| #2 | Yesu | +1.24 | 56 | 56 |
| #3 | Filth | +0.98 | 72 | 51 |
| #4 | boogiebenny | +0.79 | 66 | 65 |
| #5 | riskyray | +0.77 | 59 | 61 |





