








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1024 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 411 matches | ||
| Faceit | 147 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 59 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




32 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7281 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 31,601 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 9622 | 30% |
| Smokes | 9556 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 7710 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 4713 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,542,064 of utility $104 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 164 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lexor | 62% | 90 |
| #2 | MoRiZ15 | 60% | 68 |
| #3 | fuNy# | 59% | 54 |
| #4 | gurry | 57% | 44 |
| #5 | 𝓐𝔃𝓮𝓡𝓸𝓧 | 54% | 46 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #14 | ⓡⓤⓕⓕⓨ | 46% | 54 |
| #15 | traderjoe | 44% | 154 |
| #16 | CruX! | 44% | 64 |
| #17 | Vrodon | 44% | 96 |
| #18 | ƮأϞ | 42% | 81 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DyN4MiiC | 7 | 0.0021 |
| #2 | Tasiloooo | 7 | 0.0024 |
| #3 | Passi | 6 | 0.0025 |
| #4 | Lexor | 5 | 0.0027 |
| #5 | traderjoe | 4 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tasiloooo | 620 | 0.21 | 16 min |
| #2 | Vrodon | 568 | 0.27 | 15 min |
| #3 | traderjoe | 474 | 0.14 | 13 min |
| #4 | DyN4MiiC | 396 | 0.12 | 10 min |
| #5 | ƮأϞ | 312 | 0.18 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Passi | +5.68 | 91 | 56 |
| #2 | MoRiZ15 | +2.38 | 89 | 51 |
| #3 | traderjoe | +0.98 | 70 | 61 |
| #4 | ƮأϞ | +0.79 | 62 | 76 |
| #5 | DreamLive | +0.75 | 71 | 72 |





