








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 484 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 282 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 29 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3413 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,507 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3300 | 23% |
| Smokes | 4570 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 4417 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 2220 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $469,249 of utility $54 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 129 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MrLean | 55% | 229 |
| #2 | acaca | 55% | 225 |
| #3 | Dr. Rush | 52% | 325 |
| #4 | n | 51% | 278 |
| #5 | Ropssssssss | 48% | 181 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | n | 25 | 0.0044 |
| #2 | Ropssssssss | 20 | 0.0055 |
| #3 | MrLean | 18 | 0.0039 |
| #4 | Dr. Rush | 17 | 0.0026 |
| #5 | acaca | 15 | 0.0033 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | acaca | 1677 | 0.36 | 40 min |
| #2 | n | 1158 | 0.21 | 27 min |
| #3 | Dr. Rush | 701 | 0.11 | 20 min |
| #4 | Ropssssssss | 320 | 0.09 | 8 min |
| #5 | MrLean | 278 | 0.06 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | n | +2.78 | 77 | 61 |
| #2 | acaca | +1.07 | 74 | 69 |
| #3 | Richard | -0.06 | 43 | 58 |
| #4 | MrLean | -0.86 | 50 | 42 |
| #5 | Dr. Rush | -1.29 | 42 | 47 |





