








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 395 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 257 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




37 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2345 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,496 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1537 | 21% |
| Smokes | 2162 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1969 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 1828 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,563,615 of utility $194 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1052 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Richard | 55% | 229 |
| #3 | Ropssssssss | 54% | 90 |
| #4 | Dr. Rush | 53% | 214 |
| #5 | acaca | 51% | 197 |
| #6 | n | 51% | 171 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | n | 18 | 0.0051 |
| #2 | Dr. Rush | 11 | 0.0025 |
| #3 | acaca | 11 | 0.0027 |
| #4 | Richard | 8 | 0.0017 |
| #5 | Ropssssssss | 8 | 0.0044 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | acaca | 1396 | 0.34 | 35 min |
| #2 | n | 724 | 0.21 | 17 min |
| #3 | Richard | 558 | 0.12 | 14 min |
| #4 | Dr. Rush | 484 | 0.11 | 13 min |
| #5 | Ropssssssss | 177 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | n | +2.51 | 75 | 60 |
| #2 | acaca | +1.09 | 74 | 71 |
| #3 | Richard | +0.10 | 43 | 59 |
| #4 | MrLean | -0.55 | 50 | 42 |
| #5 | Dr. Rush | -0.85 | 41 | 47 |





