








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 263 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 294 matches | ||
| Premier | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2781 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,757 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2278 | 19% |
| Smokes | 4154 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 2514 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 2811 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,003,484 of utility $206 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1 message into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | [2Lr]C@rlok | 54% | 107 |
| #2 | HappyAchilles never Tilted :^) | 52% | 337 |
| #3 | HeathenCat | 52% | 266 |
| #4 | Bottomfragger | 49% | 338 |
| #5 | NeO_NeX | 43% | 103 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | [2Lr]C@rlok | 54% | 107 |
| #2 | HappyAchilles never Tilted :^) | 52% | 337 |
| #3 | HeathenCat | 52% | 266 |
| #4 | Bottomfragger | 49% | 338 |
| #5 | NeO_NeX | 43% | 103 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HappyAchilles never Tilted :^) | 12 | 0.0017 |
| #2 | Bottomfragger | 5 | 0.0007 |
| #3 | HeathenCat | 5 | 0.0009 |
| #4 | [2Lr]C@rlok | 5 | 0.0021 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bottomfragger | 1743 | 0.23 | 57 min |
| #2 | HappyAchilles never Tilted :^) | 954 | 0.13 | 27 min |
| #3 | HeathenCat | 495 | 0.09 | 14 min |
| #4 | NeO_NeX | 169 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #5 | [2Lr]C@rlok | 137 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HappyAchilles never Tilted :^) | +1.54 | 72 | 66 |
| #2 | Bottomfragger | +1.11 | 56 | 83 |
| #3 | HeathenCat | +1.02 | 70 | 65 |
| #4 | NeO_NeX | +0.53 | 84 | 55 |
| #5 | [2Lr]C@rlok | -0.03 | 58 | 56 |





