








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 215 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 107 matches | ||
| Faceit | 20 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2325 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,998 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 435 | 11% |
| Smokes | 1142 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1196 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 1225 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $971,498 of utility $219 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 235 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | maacyy | 67% | 18 |
| #2 | Hagelund | 67% | 51 |
| #3 | Grav | 63% | 19 |
| #4 | Knekt kibbz | 61% | 18 |
| #5 | 7ersen | 60% | 42 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hagelund | 5 | 0.0045 |
| #2 | NiToManato | 5 | 0.0046 |
| #3 | maacyy | 3 | 0.0084 |
| #4 | trymster | 1 | 0.0009 |
| #5 | TJ | 1 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 7ersen | 196 | 0.22 | 5 min |
| #2 | trymster | 120 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #3 | Hagelund | 111 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #4 | Sniw | 76 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #5 | NiToManato | 75 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NiToManato | +3.51 | 87 | 61 |
| #2 | TJ | +1.72 | 87 | 52 |
| #3 | Knekt kibbz | +1.48 | 81 | 46 |
| #4 | Hagelund | +1.33 | 74 | 65 |
| #5 | chilly | +1.20 | 76 | 55 |





