








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 578 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 390 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 90 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




27 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3073 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,397 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2845 | 21% |
| Smokes | 4676 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 3023 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 2853 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $915,602 of utility $98 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 636 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Valhalla | 52% | 137 |
| #2 | gUstaviniHo | 46% | 57 |
| #3 | Guts | 45% | 75 |
| #4 | Silver aim and global movement | 45% | 104 |
| #5 | 🆂🆄🅿🆁🅴🅼🅴 🆂🅸🅻🆅🅴🆁♿ | 45% | 49 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | kreztian | 44% | 159 |
| #8 | 𝙀𝙭𝙘𝙡𝙪𝙯𝙞𝙫𝙚 | 44% | 246 |
| #9 | Pumpy | 43% | 23 |
| #10 | Ditle | 43% | 42 |
| #11 | Froggi | 41% | 68 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 𝙀𝙭𝙘𝙡𝙪𝙯𝙞𝙫𝙚 | 21 | 0.0040 |
| #2 | Valhalla | 4 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | Glazby | 4 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | Silver aim and global movement | 4 | 0.0018 |
| #5 | kreztian | 3 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 𝙀𝙭𝙘𝙡𝙪𝙯𝙞𝙫𝙚 | 666 | 0.13 | 18 min |
| #2 | kreztian | 568 | 0.17 | 17 min |
| #3 | Guts | 356 | 0.21 | 9 min |
| #4 | Glazby | 321 | 0.11 | 11 min |
| #5 | Valhalla | 318 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Valhalla | +3.70 | 63 | 56 |
| #2 | Silver aim and global movement | +2.66 | 71 | 55 |
| #3 | gUstaviniHo | +2.08 | 56 | 77 |
| #4 | Glazby | +1.58 | 73 | 76 |
| #5 | 🆂🆄🅿🆁🅴🅼🅴 🆂🅸🅻🆅🅴🆁♿ | +1.13 | 44 | 58 |





