








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 290 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 141 matches | ||
| Faceit | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




27 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2379 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,772 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2105 | 27% |
| Smokes | 2659 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 1304 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 1704 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $333,628 of utility $70 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 188 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Phamix2k | 61% | 28 |
| #2 | sylle | 61% | 28 |
| #3 | NOOB MUS | 54% | 46 |
| #4 | $KEJ$☆॰°ₒ৹๐ | 53% | 43 |
| #5 | Rednalyn3 | 53% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ronaldo/Messi | 21 | 0.0090 |
| #2 | NOOB MUS | 11 | 0.0107 |
| #3 | $KEJ$☆॰°ₒ৹๐ | 8 | 0.0090 |
| #4 | D-ZanH*<3 CS.MONEY | 7 | 0.0041 |
| #5 | Phamix2k | 3 | 0.0049 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | D-ZanH*<3 CS.MONEY | 548 | 0.32 | 14 min |
| #2 | Ronaldo/Messi | 459 | 0.20 | 12 min |
| #3 | BigDropzz | 139 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| #4 | $KEJ$☆॰°ₒ৹๐ | 114 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #5 | sylle | 77 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sylle | +3.05 | 81 | 68 |
| #2 | D-ZanH*<3 CS.MONEY | +1.19 | 63 | 79 |
| #3 | sahbe | +1.01 | 76 | 55 |
| #4 | Ronaldo/Messi | +0.88 | 81 | 68 |
| #5 | Drømme | +0.49 | 77 | 68 |





