








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 116 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 122 matches | ||
| Premier | 104 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2790 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,220 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2304 | 37% |
| Smokes | 1595 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 841 | 14% |
| Molotovs | 1480 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $828,243 of utility $146 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 64 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 神父 | 10 | 0.0036 |
| #2 | Ha*KING*Ha | 6 | 0.0027 |
| #3 | ✪ 新界柳應廷 | 6 | 0.0040 |
| #4 | Longsanity | 4 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | SAMJ | 4 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KM.HuGo | 594 | 0.15 | 15 min |
| #2 | 神父 | 579 | 0.21 | 10 min |
| #3 | Longsanity | 563 | 0.22 | 14 min |
| #4 | ✪ 新界柳應廷 | 405 | 0.27 | 8 min |
| #5 | SAMJ | 301 | 0.21 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SAMJ | +3.46 | 80 | 60 |
| #2 | Longsanity | +1.28 | 77 | 66 |
| #3 | 神父 | +1.22 | 70 | 61 |
| #4 | Ha*KING*Ha | +0.94 | 72 | 50 |
| #5 | Zhengzhou Aquaman | +0.60 | 71 | 47 |





