








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 181 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 97 matches | ||
| Premier | 75 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 28 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




34 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2849 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,562 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2317 | 24% |
| Smokes | 1887 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 2555 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 2803 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,724,718 of utility $219 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 66 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | [B]ennyS | 71% | 24 |
| #2 | Sev | 70% | 23 |
| #3 | CAJUN | 62% | 161 |
| #4 | swifty- | 58% | 74 |
| #5 | SquintEastwood | 57% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | swifty- | 58% | 74 |
| #5 | SquintEastwood | 57% | 23 |
| #6 | Tristen | 56% | 61 |
| #7 | tdonnydoesit | 54% | 35 |
| #8 | stuffs | 54% | 50 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CAJUN | 43 | 0.0127 |
| #2 | Tristen | 19 | 0.0162 |
| #3 | swifty- | 8 | 0.0050 |
| #4 | stuffs | 6 | 0.0051 |
| #5 | tdonnydoesit | 5 | 0.0073 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CAJUN | 783 | 0.23 | 21 min |
| #2 | Tristen | 356 | 0.30 | 8 min |
| #3 | swifty- | 246 | 0.16 | 7 min |
| #4 | stuffs | 177 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| #5 | Sev | 121 | 0.29 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | swifty- | +4.05 | 86 | 68 |
| #2 | CAJUN | +3.63 | 81 | 77 |
| #3 | Tristen | +2.93 | 85 | 63 |
| #4 | Sev | +1.03 | 87 | 71 |
| #5 | stuffs | +0.05 | 74 | 68 |





