










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1242 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 147 matches | ||
| Faceit | 104 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 93 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 75 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 54 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 86 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




136 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8206 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 27,736 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 9413 | 34% |
| Smokes | 6545 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 6143 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 5635 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,605,780 of utility $126 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2311 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Prin | 82% | 34 |
| #2 | swifty- | 80% | 104 |
| #3 | Voilà | 79% | 38 |
| #4 | fowl | 72% | 32 |
| #5 | Sev | 71% | 66 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | fowl | 72% | 32 |
| #5 | Sev | 71% | 66 |
| #6 | [B]ennyS | 71% | 45 |
| #7 | Tristen | 71% | 127 |
| #8 | Heckster | 62% | 161 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tristen | 46 | 0.0194 |
| #2 | Heckster | 24 | 0.0071 |
| #3 | swifty- | 10 | 0.0049 |
| #4 | Voilà | 5 | 0.0065 |
| #5 | fowl | 4 | 0.0064 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tristen | 728 | 0.31 | 17 min |
| #2 | Heckster | 469 | 0.14 | 13 min |
| #3 | Sev | 377 | 0.30 | 10 min |
| #4 | swifty- | 364 | 0.18 | 10 min |
| #5 | Voilà | 150 | 0.20 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | swifty- | +5.31 | 85 | 65 |
| #2 | Voilà | +3.71 | 92 | 56 |
| #3 | CAJUN | +3.61 | 81 | 78 |
| #4 | Tristen | +2.66 | 85 | 62 |
| #5 | fowl | +1.38 | 64 | 68 |





