








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 239 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 62 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 54 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 25 matches | ||
| Wingman | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 32 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2183 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,563 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4588 | 37% |
| Smokes | 3593 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 2055 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 2327 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $207,279 of utility $38 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 80 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | .zzz | 53% | 19 |
| #2 | Salazar | 52% | 33 |
| #3 | viktor ☭ | 50% | 111 |
| #4 | Jisoo | 49% | 164 |
| #5 | o$zy:) for real? | 41% | 137 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | .zzz | 53% | 19 |
| #2 | Salazar | 52% | 33 |
| #3 | viktor ☭ | 50% | 111 |
| #4 | Jisoo | 49% | 164 |
| #5 | o$zy:) for real? | 41% | 137 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | o$zy:) for real? | 17 | 0.0061 |
| #2 | Jisoo | 10 | 0.0029 |
| #3 | Salazar | 6 | 0.0086 |
| #4 | viktor ☭ | 3 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | .zzz | 1 | 0.0024 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jisoo | 515 | 0.15 | 13 min |
| #2 | o$zy:) for real? | 411 | 0.15 | 9 min |
| #3 | viktor ☭ | 383 | 0.16 | 11 min |
| #4 | .zzz | 32 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #5 | Salazar | 30 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jisoo | +2.74 | 69 | 59 |
| #2 | Salazar | +0.19 | 44 | 41 |
| #3 | viktor ☭ | +0.17 | 68 | 69 |
| #4 | K - Mira abençoada/Mira Cristã | -0.89 | 70 | 64 |
| #5 | o$zy:) for real? | -1.39 | 59 | 55 |





