








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1814 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 362 matches | ||
| Premier | 337 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 202 matches | ||
| Faceit | 72 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Renown | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 23 different maps





Our logs show 117 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




262 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8981 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 37,357 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 10933 | 29% |
| Smokes | 7552 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 9386 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 9486 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,956,599 of utility $142 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1032 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mommy smurf | 68% | 145 |
| #2 | Amaziing # | 57% | 203 |
| #3 | Xanax -.- | 54% | 142 |
| #4 | Otherboi | 51% | 139 |
| #5 | Tarte aux pommes | 51% | 695 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tarte aux pommes | 249 | 0.0199 |
| #2 | Otherboi | 48 | 0.0178 |
| #3 | Xanax -.- | 43 | 0.0157 |
| #4 | lexaN | 37 | 0.0089 |
| #5 | Awgels | 36 | 0.0061 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tarte aux pommes | 2056 | 0.16 | 47 min |
| #2 | Awgels | 741 | 0.13 | 15 min |
| #3 | Amaziing # | 678 | 0.16 | 18 min |
| #4 | Mommy smurf | 318 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| #5 | Otherboi | 302 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mommy smurf | +5.45 | 87 | 55 |
| #2 | Tarte aux pommes | +2.88 | 69 | 59 |
| #3 | Awgels | +2.42 | 80 | 57 |
| #4 | lexaN | +1.08 | 56 | 59 |
| #5 | Amaziing # | +1.04 | 53 | 65 |





