








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 697 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 119 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 37 matches | ||
| Faceit | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 16 matches | ||
| Wingman | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




37 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4343 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,419 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4832 | 34% |
| Smokes | 2155 | 15% |
| HE Grenades | 3980 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 3452 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $668,535 of utility $87 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 372 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | von killah | 70% | 60 |
| #2 | sLy | 68% | 59 |
| #3 | kalmarz | 61% | 38 |
| #4 | lemac | 60% | 55 |
| #5 | morsongol | 59% | 286 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | morsongol | 1239 | 0.22 | 26 min |
| #2 | lemac | 237 | 0.23 | 7 min |
| #3 | Morgons | 182 | 0.24 | 4 min |
| #4 | kalmarz | 116 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| #5 | von killah | 73 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kalmarz | +5.09 | 91 | 67 |
| #2 | misikaro | +3.20 | 73 | 71 |
| #3 | von killah | +1.02 | 84 | 46 |
| #4 | lemac | +0.71 | 79 | 72 |
| #5 | Morgons | +0.34 | 58 | 63 |





