








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 113 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 94 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




31 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1232 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,199 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 904 | 22% |
| Smokes | 1035 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 908 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 1352 | 32% |
Our logs show you have wasted $166,537 of utility $42 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 124 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | XXWHYXX | 50% | 10 |
| #2 | :3 | 47% | 36 |
| #3 | John | 47% | 109 |
| #4 | FFflareon | 45% | 22 |
| #5 | biscuithead | 45% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Juke | 44% | 36 |
| #7 | SlimeGod | 44% | 101 |
| #8 | Divinity | 42% | 170 |
| #9 | Moga | 38% | 21 |
| #10 | KingNaveed | 26% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | John | 8 | 0.0037 |
| #2 | SlimeGod | 7 | 0.0035 |
| #3 | Divinity | 6 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | Juke | 5 | 0.0068 |
| #5 | biscuithead | 4 | 0.0065 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | John | 147 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #2 | Divinity | 145 | 0.04 | 4 min |
| #3 | Juke | 130 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| #4 | SlimeGod | 122 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #5 | Moga | 50 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | John | +5.58 | 51 | 48 |
| #2 | :3 | +3.26 | 66 | 50 |
| #3 | FFflareon | +2.70 | 41 | 30 |
| #4 | KingNaveed | +0.16 | 21 | 49 |
| #5 | XXWHYXX | -0.08 | 59 | 30 |





