








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1209 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 380 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 151 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 74 matches | ||
| Premier | 68 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 119 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




68 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8436 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 32,744 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 12888 | 39% |
| Smokes | 7401 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 7899 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 4556 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,367,296 of utility $88 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1081 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kingdom.29953 | 55% | 132 |
| #2 | JIA LOGISCH | 55% | 40 |
| #3 | ⓂⒶⓃⒾ | 53% | 79 |
| #4 | pickemgot(t)me | 53% | 484 |
| #5 | Richti | 53% | 104 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | Kräuter Kühni | 50% | 223 |
| #9 | Kuschelbär | 50% | 202 |
| #10 | Piterpat | 48% | 48 |
| #11 | AWPortunity | 47% | 177 |
| #12 | kolalabaer | 44% | 81 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pickemgot(t)me | 80 | 0.0082 |
| #2 | k4rpy | 33 | 0.0037 |
| #3 | Kitsune | 10 | 0.0031 |
| #4 | Kräuter Kühni | 8 | 0.0018 |
| #5 | Kuschelbär | 6 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pickemgot(t)me | 2203 | 0.23 | 51 min |
| #2 | k4rpy | 1134 | 0.13 | 29 min |
| #3 | Kräuter Kühni | 899 | 0.20 | 19 min |
| #4 | Kitsune | 674 | 0.21 | 17 min |
| #5 | kingdom.29953 | 579 | 0.22 | 13 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pickemgot(t)me | +2.96 | 77 | 56 |
| #2 | JIA LOGISCH | +2.96 | 68 | 42 |
| #3 | Liomnat0r | +1.97 | 60 | 73 |
| #4 | ⓂⒶⓃⒾ | +1.43 | 62 | 66 |
| #5 | Richti | +0.29 | 52 | 63 |





