








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 900 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 2 matches | ||
| Premier | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1660 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,600 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1085 | 24% |
| Smokes | 1232 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1154 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 1129 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,288,896 of utility $251 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 33 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | パパ | 78% | 51 |
| #2 | Sergeant Bussy | 75% | 24 |
| #3 | Chipstur | 70% | 20 |
| #4 | AJxMRTz | 64% | 50 |
| #5 | allllllij | 58% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #13 | selenahh6 | 51% | 87 |
| #14 | MiniMelodia1 | 48% | 21 |
| #15 | CaserPNW | 47% | 19 |
| #16 | DeafReaperr | 42% | 24 |
| #17 | niecydee | 42% | 48 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | niecydee | 4 | 0.0044 |
| #2 | Swordlink | 4 | 0.0078 |
| #3 | Tilted | 3 | 0.0025 |
| #4 | selenahh6 | 2 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | パパ | 2 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RicFlairw000 | 206 | 0.20 | 6 min |
| #2 | selenahh6 | 146 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| #3 | パパ | 125 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #4 | Tilted | 123 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #5 | Chipstur | 96 | 0.24 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chipstur | +8.93 | 84 | 80 |
| #2 | パパ | +6.04 | 65 | 69 |
| #3 | Tilted | +5.05 | 62 | 48 |
| #4 | Spip | +2.76 | 34 | 46 |
| #5 | selenahh6 | +0.38 | 24 | 58 |





