








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 5 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
97 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 155 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 75 | 48% |
| Smokes | 9 | 6% |
| HE Grenades | 46 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 25 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $23,018 of utility $72 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 8 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | yetiman1 | 50% | 2 |
| #2 | smol red chonk | 40% | 5 |
| #3 | poopsack | 33% | 3 |
| #4 | U10D | 33% | 3 |
| #5 | xtracoolguy137 | 25% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | poopsack | 1 | 0.0213 |
| #2 | Ayden | 1 | 0.0233 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ye West | 26 | 0.22 | 1 min |
| #2 | xtracoolguy137 | 15 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| #3 | U10D | 4 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| #4 | poopsack | 3 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| #5 | smol red chonk | 1 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | smol red chonk | +3.98 | 97 | 26 |
| #2 | Ye West | +2.36 | 69 | 45 |
| #3 | U10D | +1.80 | 76 | 34 |
| #4 | poopsack | +0.73 | 89 | 49 |
| #5 | yetiman1 | +0.13 | 46 | 37 |





