








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 277 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 88 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 78 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 71 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 39 matches | ||
| Premier | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 89 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2671 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,957 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1330 | 15% |
| Smokes | 1423 | 16% |
| HE Grenades | 3593 | 40% |
| Molotovs | 2611 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,970,607 of utility $248 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 106 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Flamongo | 60% | 30 |
| #2 | FueL | 40% | 88 |
| #3 | Charles P. Scene | 38% | 384 |
| #4 | Whackforest | 36% | 179 |
| #5 | FUCK OFF | 36% | 244 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | FueL | 40% | 88 |
| #3 | Charles P. Scene | 38% | 384 |
| #4 | Whackforest | 36% | 179 |
| #5 | FUCK OFF | 36% | 244 |
| #6 | frankyyy* | 28% | 113 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Charles P. Scene | 37 | 0.0048 |
| #2 | FueL | 22 | 0.0136 |
| #3 | FUCK OFF | 21 | 0.0043 |
| #4 | frankyyy* | 12 | 0.0052 |
| #5 | Flamongo | 5 | 0.0084 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Charles P. Scene | 596 | 0.08 | 14 min |
| #2 | FUCK OFF | 348 | 0.07 | 9 min |
| #3 | FueL | 313 | 0.19 | 11 min |
| #4 | frankyyy* | 251 | 0.11 | 8 min |
| #5 | Whackforest | 107 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FueL | +4.92 | 58 | 80 |
| #2 | frankyyy* | +4.44 | 82 | 61 |
| #3 | Flamongo | +4.39 | 80 | 59 |
| #4 | Crackforest | +0.11 | 56 | 55 |
| #5 | Charles P. Scene | -0.59 | 45 | 64 |





