








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 722 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 79 matches | ||
| Premier | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 48 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2022 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,021 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2331 | 29% |
| Smokes | 2095 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1852 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 1743 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $285,829 of utility $75 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 157 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jimmY-A-EIZO | 70% | 20 |
| #2 | Big-Shaq | 60% | 20 |
| #3 | row | 58% | 12 |
| #4 | VorTexPrimezZ | 54% | 41 |
| #5 | chrizZ | 52% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | row | 58% | 12 |
| #4 | VorTexPrimezZ | 54% | 41 |
| #5 | chrizZ | 52% | 21 |
| #6 | ARIZE | 50% | 16 |
| #7 | Farid Flashbang | 44% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Farid Flashbang | 6 | 0.0153 |
| #2 | Big-Shaq | 3 | 0.0070 |
| #3 | VorTexPrimezZ | 1 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | VorTexPrimezZ | 164 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| #2 | jimmY-A-EIZO | 87 | 0.20 | 2 min |
| #3 | chrizZ | 59 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #4 | row | 40 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #5 | Big-Shaq | 31 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dan1l | +2.16 | 92 | 65 |
| #2 | jimmY-A-EIZO | +1.80 | 68 | 61 |
| #3 | Big-Shaq | +1.35 | 70 | 33 |
| #4 | ARIZE | +1.05 | 74 | 31 |
| #5 | chrizZ | +0.50 | 75 | 64 |





