








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 77 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 47 matches | ||
| Wingman | 16 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
582 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,522 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 139 | 9% |
| Smokes | 448 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 529 | 35% |
| Molotovs | 406 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $230,682 of utility $174 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 14 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | myTrusT ツ | 80% | 5 |
| #2 | m1keeh | 80% | 5 |
| #3 | 『sʜʀᴋ』 Łud1สm | 75% | 4 |
| #4 | VorTexPrimezZ | 53% | 40 |
| #5 | breezyyLLLLLLLLL | 50% | 6 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | VorTexPrimezZ | 53% | 40 |
| #5 | breezyyLLLLLLLLL | 50% | 6 |
| #6 | dan1l | 50% | 16 |
| #7 | "superCyReex | 40% | 5 |
| #8 | prfectn_ | 31% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | prfectn_ | 1 | 0.0043 |
| #2 | myTrusT ツ | 1 | 0.0100 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | VorTexPrimezZ | 174 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| #2 | dan1l | 58 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #3 | breezyyLLLLLLLLL | 30 | 0.22 | 1 min |
| #4 | myTrusT ツ | 15 | 0.15 | 0 min |
| #5 | "superCyReex | 13 | 0.11 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | myTrusT ツ | +2.25 | 87 | 84 |
| #2 | "superCyReex | +0.91 | 80 | 51 |
| #3 | ARIZE | +0.85 | 78 | 39 |
| #4 | prfectn_ | +0.58 | 85 | 12 |
| #5 | m1keeh | +0.38 | 76 | 30 |





