








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 97 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 61 matches | ||
| Premier | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
742 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,726 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 478 | 18% |
| Smokes | 779 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 681 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 788 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $342,715 of utility $177 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 144 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gates Of Olympus | 75% | 8 |
| #2 | HAFLA-G | 65% | 20 |
| #3 | raz ♿ | 64% | 14 |
| #4 | kim's nr1 cs spiller | 63% | 8 |
| #5 | em0$tarr | 56% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RuTz0u * Noesis.gg | 1 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | em0$tarr | 71 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #2 | raz ♿ | 55 | 0.19 | 2 min |
| #3 | HAFLA-G | 37 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #4 | RuTz0u * Noesis.gg | 28 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #5 | kim's nr1 cs spiller | 28 | 0.17 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | em0$tarr | +3.98 | 83 | 67 |
| #2 | HAFLA-G | +2.60 | 73 | 57 |
| #3 | kim's nr1 cs spiller | +0.85 | 56 | 71 |
| #4 | Gates Of Olympus | +0.58 | 66 | 75 |
| #5 | Pr. Mac klejne | +0.54 | 64 | 53 |





