








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 452 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 270 matches | ||
| Faceit | 79 matches | ||
| Wingman | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 35 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




36 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6029 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,946 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7574 | 42% |
| Smokes | 4106 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1956 | 11% |
| Molotovs | 4310 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $820,256 of utility $82 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 678 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | jKUB1 | 57% | 116 |
| #6 | draco. | 52% | 71 |
| #7 | brofx | 52% | 48 |
| #8 | BT | 50% | 32 |
| #9 | jozko | 50% | 92 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bmw enjoyer | 20 | 0.0048 |
| #2 | philexx | 10 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | jKUB1 | 6 | 0.0025 |
| #4 | jozko | 6 | 0.0031 |
| #5 | brofx | 4 | 0.0038 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | philexx | 690 | 0.12 | 18 min |
| #2 | bmw enjoyer | 402 | 0.10 | 9 min |
| #3 | jKUB1 | 307 | 0.13 | 8 min |
| #4 | brofx | 263 | 0.25 | 6 min |
| #5 | jozko | 121 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ivan | +3.80 | 89 | 67 |
| #2 | bmw enjoyer | +1.55 | 89 | 59 |
| #3 | philexx | +0.37 | 73 | 61 |
| #4 | brofx | -0.28 | 68 | 65 |
| #5 | jKUB1 | -0.49 | 73 | 54 |





