








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 7 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 255 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




29 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3174 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,189 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4192 | 32% |
| Smokes | 3276 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 3327 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 2394 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $555,680 of utility $85 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 291 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | deadman | 50% | 44 |
| #2 | Ch3rry | 50% | 180 |
| #3 | D3V|L | 49% | 172 |
| #4 | Kr3uL | 46% | 167 |
| #5 | EgLeO | 44% | 75 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Kr3uL | 46% | 167 |
| #5 | EgLeO | 44% | 75 |
| #6 | baller | 43% | 28 |
| #7 | r0ny | 38% | 37 |
| #8 | Co1t | 37% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ch3rry | 10 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | D3V|L | 8 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | Kr3uL | 5 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | deadman | 2 | 0.0021 |
| #5 | EgLeO | 1 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | D3V|L | 714 | 0.20 | 22 min |
| #2 | Ch3rry | 638 | 0.17 | 13 min |
| #3 | Kr3uL | 348 | 0.10 | 9 min |
| #4 | EgLeO | 265 | 0.17 | 8 min |
| #5 | r0ny | 89 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kr3uL | +1.12 | 64 | 54 |
| #2 | deadman | +0.62 | 63 | 75 |
| #3 | baller | +0.32 | 56 | 68 |
| #4 | D3V|L | +0.05 | 77 | 75 |
| #5 | King of Mirzapur | -0.53 | 59 | 70 |





