








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 105 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 230 matches | ||
| Renown | 16 matches | ||
| Premier | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 80 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3118 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,403 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5153 | 36% |
| Smokes | 4349 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 2115 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 2786 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $758,979 of utility $119 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 553 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | [milo] Berlin | 62% | 103 |
| #2 | [milo] Crowebis | 60% | 35 |
| #3 | naetb | 60% | 80 |
| #4 | HooseRiice | 60% | 159 |
| #5 | [milo] Hambeglin | 56% | 178 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | [milo] Hambeglin | 56% | 178 |
| #6 | [milo] xlk | 55% | 230 |
| #7 | custard tanks | 54% | 124 |
| #8 | [milo] Paniik | 54% | 39 |
| #9 | [milo] boyish | 53% | 95 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | [milo] xlk | 6 | 0.0012 |
| #2 | [milo] Hambeglin | 6 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | custard tanks | 4 | 0.0015 |
| #4 | [milo] boyish | 3 | 0.0014 |
| #5 | naetb | 3 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HooseRiice | 750 | 0.22 | 20 min |
| #2 | [milo] xlk | 513 | 0.10 | 10 min |
| #3 | custard tanks | 456 | 0.17 | 14 min |
| #4 | [milo] Hambeglin | 422 | 0.11 | 9 min |
| #5 | [milo] Berlin | 331 | 0.15 | 11 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | naetb | +2.05 | 79 | 70 |
| #2 | [milo] Berlin | +1.33 | 79 | 66 |
| #3 | JADAM | +1.20 | 69 | 81 |
| #4 | HooseRiice | +1.15 | 74 | 74 |
| #5 | [milo] Paniik | +0.04 | 65 | 54 |





