








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 49 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 149 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1782 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,625 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1775 | 23% |
| Smokes | 2083 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1820 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1947 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $528,716 of utility $117 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 149 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | naetb | 58% | 59 |
| #2 | [milo] Berlin | 55% | 33 |
| #3 | HooseRiice | 54% | 83 |
| #4 | [milo] xlk | 54% | 117 |
| #5 | JADAM | 53% | 95 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | JADAM | 53% | 95 |
| #6 | [milo] Hambeglin | 51% | 105 |
| #7 | [milo] Paniik | 50% | 12 |
| #8 | custard tanks | 46% | 67 |
| #9 | [milo] Crowebis | 39% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | naetb | 8 | 0.0063 |
| #2 | [milo] xlk | 4 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | [milo] Hambeglin | 3 | 0.0013 |
| #4 | JADAM | 3 | 0.0014 |
| #5 | custard tanks | 3 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JADAM | 572 | 0.27 | 16 min |
| #2 | HooseRiice | 400 | 0.22 | 11 min |
| #3 | [milo] xlk | 322 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #4 | custard tanks | 290 | 0.19 | 10 min |
| #5 | [milo] Hambeglin | 281 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | naetb | +3.53 | 82 | 73 |
| #2 | [milo] Berlin | +2.27 | 71 | 72 |
| #3 | JADAM | +1.50 | 72 | 81 |
| #4 | [milo] Paniik | +1.12 | 56 | 55 |
| #5 | HooseRiice | +1.10 | 76 | 74 |





