








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2074 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 578 matches | ||
| Premier | 324 matches | ||
| Wingman | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 30 different maps





Our logs show 53 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




78 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
14498 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 40,011 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 9923 | 25% |
| Smokes | 12409 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 8042 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 9637 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $4,396,853 of utility $174 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 4803 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | stattik | 70% | 111 |
| #2 | KENZO | 69% | 61 |
| #3 | ninjavitis | 68% | 124 |
| #4 | Tyler | 67% | 102 |
| #5 | UNT_Saber | 66% | 68 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | ☹ | AdamRS | 59% | 88 |
| #10 | Coco | 59% | 61 |
| #11 | xelA^s | 55% | 73 |
| #12 | loogah | 54% | 103 |
| #13 | ROBOTAIM Vlanderson Anderson | 49% | 91 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | xelA^s | 15 | 0.0098 |
| #2 | Coco | 11 | 0.0075 |
| #3 | ninjavitis | 10 | 0.0037 |
| #4 | Draven | 5 | 0.0023 |
| #5 | Tyler | 5 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | william | 627 | 0.16 | 16 min |
| #2 | ninjavitis | 609 | 0.23 | 15 min |
| #3 | stattik | 483 | 0.21 | 15 min |
| #4 | Coco | 347 | 0.24 | 9 min |
| #5 | Tyler | 295 | 0.13 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | red bull guzzler | +2.63 | 87 | 59 |
| #2 | stattik | +2.39 | 83 | 73 |
| #3 | william | +2.36 | 85 | 64 |
| #4 | ninjavitis | +1.96 | 88 | 72 |
| #5 | Tyler | +1.67 | 84 | 66 |





