








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 82 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 112 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1662 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,215 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1376 | 33% |
| Smokes | 1176 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 615 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 1048 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $355,767 of utility $92 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 20 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Anonymous Heavy | 60% | 15 |
| #2 | Godlonso | 58% | 12 |
| #3 | ✪ Syckling | 50% | 10 |
| #4 | 7ourney | 50% | 20 |
| #5 | para | 46% | 65 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #16 | Awsus | 37% | 27 |
| #17 | _Toxik | 36% | 14 |
| #18 | feen | 35% | 26 |
| #19 | Arcann | 30% | 23 |
| #20 | Big Chef | 30% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | para | 6 | 0.0042 |
| #2 | _Toxik | 4 | 0.0128 |
| #3 | Godlonso | 4 | 0.0148 |
| #4 | Arcann | 3 | 0.0056 |
| #5 | 7ourney | 3 | 0.0068 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | para | 257 | 0.18 | 6 min |
| #2 | Suspec7 | 116 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #3 | Splash | 89 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #4 | feen | 88 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #5 | Arcann | 70 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CmK ✞ | +4.25 | 84 | 39 |
| #2 | Anonymous Heavy | +3.65 | 82 | 35 |
| #3 | Godlonso | +1.72 | 67 | 46 |
| #4 | deftones | +1.64 | 67 | 61 |
| #5 | para | +1.60 | 68 | 57 |





