








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 272 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 147 matches | ||
| Faceit | 49 matches | ||
| Esplay | 16 matches | 2,237 | |
| Wingman | 9 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3353 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,217 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3272 | 32% |
| Smokes | 2268 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 2088 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 2589 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $562,016 of utility $102 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 221 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | vakken | 80% | 15 |
| #2 | kapder ff | 78% | 18 |
| #3 | støkker | 76% | 17 |
| #4 | Vestby | 71% | 14 |
| #5 | Makrellen | 66% | 64 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ❤✪♛KaKe er godt♛✪❤ | +2.09 | 80 | 70 |
| #2 | krydder =DDDD BLM | +2.00 | 83 | 63 |
| #3 | kapder ff | +0.80 | 81 | 58 |
| #4 | eriksen | +0.39 | 66 | 51 |
| #5 | DuuPern | +0.36 | 80 | 47 |





