








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 79 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 65 matches | ||
| Premier | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1097 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,831 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1292 | 34% |
| Smokes | 1142 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 536 | 14% |
| Molotovs | 861 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $350,830 of utility $143 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 34 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | D1m1 | 67% | 18 |
| #2 | Faylanks | 59% | 27 |
| #3 | Preston | 53% | 74 |
| #4 | cloud | 51% | 59 |
| #5 | ♥♡제니artinny0쯔위♡♥ | 51% | 79 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Faylanks | 59% | 27 |
| #3 | Preston | 53% | 74 |
| #4 | cloud | 51% | 59 |
| #5 | ♥♡제니artinny0쯔위♡♥ | 51% | 79 |
| #6 | aware | 51% | 81 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Preston | 2 | 0.0013 |
| #2 | aware | 1 | 0.0006 |
| #3 | ♥♡제니artinny0쯔위♡♥ | 1 | 0.0006 |
| #4 | Faylanks | 1 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aware | 368 | 0.21 | 11 min |
| #2 | ♥♡제니artinny0쯔위♡♥ | 236 | 0.14 | 7 min |
| #3 | Preston | 119 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #4 | cloud | 112 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #5 | Faylanks | 90 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♥♡제니artinny0쯔위♡♥ | +1.29 | 70 | 70 |
| #2 | aware | +0.53 | 72 | 74 |
| #3 | cloud | +0.15 | 85 | 45 |
| #4 | Faylanks | -0.20 | 64 | 59 |
| #5 | del | -0.44 | 80 | 62 |





