








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 254 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 184 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Faceit | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




56 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3076 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,000 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2733 | 39% |
| Smokes | 957 | 14% |
| HE Grenades | 2253 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 1057 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $383,562 of utility $61 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 242 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | aatu | 50% | 80 |
| #12 | Kahvikuppi | 48% | 23 |
| #13 | MoTzis | 47% | 107 |
| #14 | tosiirt | 41% | 22 |
| #15 | beast | 30% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aatu | 510 | 0.30 | 14 min |
| #2 | MoTzis | 206 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #3 | HÖNÖ | 168 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| #4 | markku | 139 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #5 | 𝙂𝙖𝙣𝙙𝙖𝙡𝙛 | 100 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | スブラ | +3.96 | 93 | 70 |
| #2 | HÖNÖ | +3.05 | 85 | 66 |
| #3 | スブラ | +2.95 | 88 | 58 |
| #4 | Smokey | +2.69 | 91 | 65 |
| #5 | markku | +1.34 | 56 | 52 |





