








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 364 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 178 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 16 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2302 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,492 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3190 | 34% |
| Smokes | 2209 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 2395 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 1698 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $720,592 of utility $143 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 706 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tyttökulta | 68% | 22 |
| #2 | Vasily | 57% | 35 |
| #3 | Hitmarker | 55% | 91 |
| #4 | Vippi | 54% | 101 |
| #5 | 𝓙𝓪𝓻𝓲 | 54% | 85 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Hitmarker | 55% | 91 |
| #4 | Vippi | 54% | 101 |
| #5 | 𝓙𝓪𝓻𝓲 | 54% | 85 |
| #6 | 33tv1r | 50% | 129 |
| #7 | jusuf | 45% | 38 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vippi | 3 | 0.0014 |
| #2 | 𝓙𝓪𝓻𝓲 | 3 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | Hitmarker | 2 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | Tyttökulta | 2 | 0.0047 |
| #5 | 33tv1r | 1 | 0.0004 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vippi | 333 | 0.16 | 8 min |
| #2 | 𝓙𝓪𝓻𝓲 | 222 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| #3 | 33tv1r | 161 | 0.06 | 5 min |
| #4 | jusuf | 151 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| #5 | Vasily | 131 | 0.19 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tyttökulta | +1.72 | 39 | 68 |
| #2 | Vippi | +1.17 | 58 | 60 |
| #3 | Vasily | +1.08 | 69 | 62 |
| #4 | Giggelsson | +0.97 | 79 | 71 |
| #5 | 33tv1r | +0.73 | 64 | 59 |





