










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 231 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 182 matches | ||
| Faceit | 17 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 37 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1940 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,749 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2176 | 25% |
| Smokes | 2054 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 2106 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 2413 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $752,895 of utility $138 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 596 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vasily | 73% | 15 |
| #2 | Hitmarker | 56% | 62 |
| #3 | Vippi | 54% | 59 |
| #4 | Giggelsson | 54% | 85 |
| #5 | muhk3l1 | 53% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Giggelsson | 4 | 0.0023 |
| #2 | 33tv1r | 2 | 0.0010 |
| #3 | TyttΓΆkulta | 2 | 0.0017 |
| #4 | Vippi | 1 | 0.0009 |
| #5 | muhk3l1 | 1 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | muhk3l1 | +2.44 | 77 | 41 |
| #2 | Vasily | +1.74 | 64 | 55 |
| #3 | Vippi | +1.55 | 58 | 61 |
| #4 | Giggelsson | +1.40 | 81 | 74 |
| #5 | 33tv1r | +0.75 | 62 | 59 |





