








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 71 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 423 matches | ||
| Wingman | 36 matches | ||
| Faceit | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




27 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6383 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 25,494 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7472 | 29% |
| Smokes | 6723 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 5530 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 5769 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $829,785 of utility $73 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 195 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dia | 66% | 29 |
| #2 | mooZ^ | 55% | 29 |
| #3 | inZ | 55% | 55 |
| #4 | ✪ Nalar | 52% | 143 |
| #5 | aWsM | 52% | 159 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | ✪ Nalar | 52% | 143 |
| #5 | aWsM | 52% | 159 |
| #6 | bilb0r | 51% | 178 |
| #7 | SevusLeute | 49% | 150 |
| #8 | Hansi | 45% | 65 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Nalar | 13 | 0.0046 |
| #2 | Hansi | 10 | 0.0097 |
| #3 | aWsM | 7 | 0.0021 |
| #4 | bilb0r | 6 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | inZ | 5 | 0.0044 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bilb0r | 814 | 0.21 | 23 min |
| #2 | ✪ Nalar | 700 | 0.25 | 17 min |
| #3 | aWsM | 522 | 0.16 | 17 min |
| #4 | SevusLeute | 414 | 0.14 | 9 min |
| #5 | mooZ^ | 181 | 0.29 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Nalar | +1.17 | 62 | 69 |
| #2 | inZ | +1.12 | 76 | 48 |
| #3 | aWsM | +0.82 | 78 | 72 |
| #4 | mooZ^ | +0.80 | 83 | 81 |
| #5 | Hansi | +0.70 | 75 | 53 |





