








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 533 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 227 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 43 matches | ||
| Wingman | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 24 matches | ||
| Faceit | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 27 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4509 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,317 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4081 | 19% |
| Smokes | 7118 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 4519 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 5599 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $832,453 of utility $75 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 349 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sh4doW | 53% | 118 |
| #2 | korhonev22 | 50% | 147 |
| #3 | Harteezy | 49% | 161 |
| #4 | Von eziroo | 48% | 33 |
| #5 | Hiirqi | 47% | 97 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tumples | 11 | 0.0023 |
| #2 | Harteezy | 10 | 0.0030 |
| #3 | Coira | 8 | 0.0022 |
| #4 | K_ass_u | 6 | 0.0017 |
| #5 | Sh4doW | 4 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Magel | 896 | 0.31 | 25 min |
| #2 | Harteezy | 427 | 0.13 | 11 min |
| #3 | me♡ukatti | 326 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| #4 | K_ass_u | 300 | 0.09 | 6 min |
| #5 | Hiirqi | 242 | 0.12 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Intozzz | +3.64 | 66 | 67 |
| #2 | Hiirqi | +2.10 | 61 | 71 |
| #3 | Harteezy | +1.37 | 56 | 56 |
| #4 | Sh4doW | +0.66 | 63 | 67 |
| #5 | Tuippis | -0.03 | 65 | 46 |





