








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 70 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
838 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,181 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 552 | 17% |
| Smokes | 699 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 1037 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 893 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $494,348 of utility $162 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 150 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Sjovall | 42% | 24 |
| #8 | Kanounis | 41% | 74 |
| #9 | PargasSimpen cs.money | 38% | 8 |
| #10 | SipiZ | 36% | 14 |
| #11 | PromillePeek Faceplant | 25% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kanounis | 5 | 0.0037 |
| #2 | Wolfie | 4 | 0.0027 |
| #3 | KorvN #VAC | 4 | 0.0056 |
| #4 | SnigiNN | 3 | 0.0056 |
| #5 | konffen | 2 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | konffen | 270 | 0.20 | 8 min |
| #2 | Kanounis | 243 | 0.18 | 5 min |
| #3 | Wolfie | 215 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| #4 | Sjovall | 126 | 0.25 | 3 min |
| #5 | KorvN #VAC | 123 | 0.17 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KorvN #VAC | +4.74 | 67 | 68 |
| #2 | Wolfie | +2.98 | 75 | 60 |
| #3 | SnigiNN | +2.55 | 79 | 71 |
| #4 | TotoroPower | +2.40 | 79 | 77 |
| #5 | Kanounis | +1.96 | 85 | 56 |





