








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 235 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September

The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 385 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2891 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,421 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 409 | 6% |
| Smokes | 1771 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 2899 | 45% |
| Molotovs | 1342 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,296,312 of utility $142 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 118 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | snuffelaar | 50% | 186 |
| #2 | iThrowPower | 49% | 225 |
| #3 | Meijstro | 48% | 266 |
| #4 | DeFlexi | 48% | 95 |
| #5 | Gorrlock Prime | 48% | 126 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | DeFlexi | 48% | 95 |
| #5 | Gorrlock Prime | 48% | 126 |
| #6 | DeMexi | 46% | 263 |
| #7 | DMT101 | 45% | 170 |
| #8 | Agger | 35% | 52 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DeMexi | 13 | 0.0023 |
| #2 | Meijstro | 12 | 0.0021 |
| #3 | snuffelaar | 10 | 0.0026 |
| #4 | DMT101 | 8 | 0.0022 |
| #5 | Gorrlock Prime | 7 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | snuffelaar | 294 | 0.08 | 7 min |
| #2 | DMT101 | 253 | 0.07 | 8 min |
| #3 | Gorrlock Prime | 233 | 0.09 | 7 min |
| #4 | Meijstro | 171 | 0.03 | 4 min |
| #5 | DeFlexi | 136 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | iThrowPower | +3.56 | 87 | 32 |
| #2 | DeFlexi | +1.33 | 69 | 57 |
| #3 | snuffelaar | +0.86 | 66 | 56 |
| #4 | Meijstro | +0.80 | 73 | 54 |
| #5 | DMT101 | +0.12 | 38 | 70 |





