








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 111 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 127 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 48 matches | ||
| Faceit | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 16 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2337 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,453 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1934 | 26% |
| Smokes | 1440 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 2846 | 38% |
| Molotovs | 1233 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $777,418 of utility $120 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 28 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ice Cold Nutz | 58% | 24 |
| #2 | Varmaan joku bugi? | 53% | 17 |
| #3 | Kapizh | 53% | 38 |
| #4 | FЯAG | 52% | 69 |
| #5 | handd | 51% | 87 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Varmaan joku bugi? | 5 | 0.0150 |
| #2 | Kapizh | 3 | 0.0037 |
| #3 | handd | 2 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | FЯAG | 2 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | Malibu I♿I⛟I♿I⛟I♿I⛟ | 2 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nani | 1061 | 0.25 | 29 min |
| #2 | Eli | 249 | 0.21 | 7 min |
| #3 | FЯAG | 164 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| #4 | Kapizh | 155 | 0.19 | 5 min |
| #5 | handd | 149 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | zrfnd | +1.76 | 70 | 77 |
| #2 | Kapizh | +1.68 | 52 | 70 |
| #3 | Malibu I♿I⛟I♿I⛟I♿I⛟ | +1.63 | 72 | 63 |
| #4 | Ice Cold Nutz | +1.30 | 45 | 64 |
| #5 | Varmaan joku bugi? | +1.13 | 49 | 76 |





