








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 281 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 89 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 16 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2525 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,165 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 698 | 11% |
| Smokes | 2951 | 48% |
| HE Grenades | 808 | 13% |
| Molotovs | 1708 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,661,312 of utility $217 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 109 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Skoova Stev | 49% | 262 |
| #2 | π π² π΄ π² π» π± | 48% | 61 |
| #3 | SjΓΆmaN | 47% | 360 |
| #4 | Unkel Stuart | 47% | 367 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Skoova Stev | 49% | 262 |
| #2 | π π² π΄ π² π» π± | 48% | 61 |
| #3 | SjΓΆmaN | 47% | 360 |
| #4 | Unkel Stuart | 47% | 367 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SjΓΆmaN | 13 | 0.0018 |
| #2 | Unkel Stuart | 7 | 0.0009 |
| #3 | Skoova Stev | 6 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | π π² π΄ π² π» π± | 2 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SjΓΆmaN | 1519 | 0.21 | 41 min |
| #2 | Skoova Stev | 671 | 0.13 | 14 min |
| #3 | Unkel Stuart | 260 | 0.03 | 5 min |
| #4 | π π² π΄ π² π» π± | 227 | 0.18 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SjΓΆmaN | +2.71 | 58 | 59 |
| #2 | π π² π΄ π² π» π± | +2.20 | 59 | 63 |
| #3 | Ricardo Milos | -0.91 | 50 | 35 |
| #4 | Skoova Stev | -1.19 | 36 | 55 |
| #5 | Unkel Stuart | -1.88 | 47 | 45 |





