








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 217 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 106 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 24 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1391 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,341 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1347 | 18% |
| Smokes | 2111 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1872 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 2011 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $492,538 of utility $136 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 327 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AgentB | 67% | 9 |
| #2 | DrPanda_1 | 65% | 17 |
| #3 | Feynman | 54% | 13 |
| #4 | Sir mourning | 50% | 26 |
| #5 | NecessaryEvil | 49% | 57 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | Nicky | 43% | 77 |
| #11 | Straat-Kat | 42% | 43 |
| #12 | Rainƒall | 39% | 44 |
| #13 | (>_VOSS_<) | 36% | 28 |
| #14 | [PandaBang] Sleeves | 29% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | (Pandabang) ✞FR3D5T3R✞ | 3 | 0.0036 |
| #2 | Bigfatfrogg | 2 | 0.0019 |
| #3 | A.D | 2 | 0.0022 |
| #4 | (>_VOSS_<) | 2 | 0.0032 |
| #5 | Nicky | 1 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bigfatfrogg | 120 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #2 | A.D | 94 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #3 | (Pandabang) ✞FR3D5T3R✞ | 93 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #4 | NecessaryEvil | 81 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #5 | Feynman | 77 | 0.32 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DrPanda_1 | +4.24 | 75 | 67 |
| #2 | AgentB | +2.99 | 75 | 65 |
| #3 | Speedwobble | +2.28 | 77 | 61 |
| #4 | A.D | +1.35 | 55 | 65 |
| #5 | NecessaryEvil | +1.23 | 30 | 44 |





